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WiiU screenshot TV 0142C

Mario is the scourge of the koopa troop. FUCK HIS BALLS KOOPAZ

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Mario
Mario in 3-dimension

Mario is a goddamn turd that constantly commits mass murder against Bowser's extended family. He smokes mushrooms, Super Stars, and can somehow fly after putting on a cape. Being Italian, he also has ties with the Mafia and hangs out with John Gotti smoking mushrooms and putting hits out on Bowser's children. In short, he is is a wanted serial killer that should be placed on trial for his crimes against humanity.


Early Life[]

Mario was born in 1898 in Naples, Italy. His father, Pisano Capone Romano, was an infamous Mafia leader that terrorized Italy with theft, drug trafficking, and murder. When he wanted someone dead, he would cook a juicy Lasagna Dinner for the person and send it to his/her house. The person, convinced by Capone's henchmen that it was a reward for their hard work, would eat the Lasagna and die a slow and painful death.What was his secret ingredient? Some say it was cyanide, others say it was venom from a Cobra, but Capone never told anyone his secret ingredient except his sons Mario and Luigi. Mario lived a comfortable life with his brother Luigi and his parents Capone and Maria Romano.On June 6, 1909, Capone was arrested for tax fraud and was sentenced to 15 years in prison.This caused the Romano family to flee to the Mushroom Kingdom (America was "too full" for immigrants at the time.")

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